Ad-Lib#10, Geekiness and Khichdi

Ads had Science week in school. They were supposed to perform simple experiments in class, make a presentation on endangered animals and think of puzzles/riddles to quiz their classmates on. Altogether a lot of fun for our geek. He came back home everyday quite disillusioned with his classmates' overall lack of knowledge! "Amma, they don't even know that tigers and lions' habitats are totally different! Amma, they don't know that tigers and lions have existed since prehistoric times. Amma, so-and-so did such a silly experiment - everyone knows water is colourless and odourless! All the children in my class think polar bears hibernate!"

These were some of the comments he passed as soon as he entered the door. But my favourite, as always - "They don't know nothing! They only know cricket!"

Many a time, I've also been accused of the same ignorance! When I was travelling, he would bombard me with facts like "Do you know a walrus weighs 1.2 tons?" I'd say "Yeah?" at which he would explode - "Amma, why are you not surprised?? A walrus' weight is 1.2 TONS!!! You're not LISTENING!"

I've been telling him that we will watch the Olympic highlights together and make a list of all the Indian medalists, and we'll also watch the tennis and swimming events (since he's currently learning both). He isn't very keen and thinks sports are a waste of his time.

Time better spent in getting to be more geeky, eh?

Someone asked Y yesterday what did she like best and she said polar bears. She also wants to be a zoologist like her hero. Only condition - she will wear pink and not brown like the boring clothes that most zoologists wear. Ads teased her - "You are a khichdi. You need to wear brown for camouflage. The wild animals will see you and they'll eat you up."

Y wailed. Not because the wild animals would eat her (lesser problem!) but because her Anna called her a Khichdi. Don't ask me what it means. That's the most insulting thing they ever say to each other! Sometimes, when they get mad at me, I can hear them whispering to each other - Amma is a khichdi.

Daddy goes solo

Almost obscenely abundant greenery everywhere, emerald paddy fields, rubber plantations, clean roads, grey menacing clouds – where else but in Kerala? I was in Palakkad for a couple of days for a project that are pitching for. As always, I was blown away by the natural beauty all around me. S and I have done Kerala in bits and pieces over the years and managed to cover most of the state but Palakkad is one district we have never visited.

Anyway, back to basics. S has been in absentia, on a fair bit of travel for the last month. The last week, he was in Gurgaon on a flexible schedule and therefore I pushed for my work-related travel to happen during this time. There was a tiny bit of apprehension since this would be the first time that he would be alone with the kids and handling the routine craziness of a school day. I was confident that he could do it provided the domestic help landed up on time and did not take every other day off as they have been doing of late.  As it happens, my maid and cook have a soft corner for bhaiya; clearly they think he is some hapless male forced to take on child-rearing responsibilities while didi goes off on pleasure jaunts. S was very confident that they would report to work without fail and on time, something they somehow never manage with me! I’m happy to report that his confidence was not misplaced, though I’m also sure they are going to play truant now that I am back.

In fact, the only challenge they faced was how to tie Y’s hair, S never having learnt how to handle a hairband! We had a 15 minute negotiation before I left. Y sweetly suggested that Appa learn how to braid her hair to form 2 plaits. I countered that it wasn’t necessary and that she should be content with one ponytail for the 4 days that I would be away. She was most reluctant (she doesn’t like the single ponytail) but once we were able to convince her that she actually looked better with one pony instead of two, she gave in with bad grace. I’m glad that was the only roadblock we encountered!

S says he was able to manage just fine but that his work had to take a backseat, being crammed into the few hours when the kids were at school. He apparently had a long conf-call with the folks in the US and Y sat quietly at his side throughout, working with her crayons and glitter pens. This might be an important milestone for us in our journey towards (more or less) equally-shared parenting.

Clearly, they all managed just fine without me (maybe even better!). Have I made myself redundant? I certainly hope so!

A 'zoo' on the floor

On a weekend afternoon, as the rest of the family snoozes, this is what a bored boy gets upto. Start with creating a whole zoo on the floor, then move on to specific habitats.
Does your kid have the 5 best toys of all time? :)

Panoramic view of the zoo :)

Or rather, "American Zoo", as the white notice stuck to the cupboard proclaims. The white bear and Ludo counters are "the statues at the entrance, Amma." Note the emergency vehicles all ready and waiting.

The "safari"and at the back is the grassland habitat (a green plastic cover) with zebras.

Board game covers, pressure cooker gaskets, Pediasure 'dabbas' have all become zoo enclosures :)

The toy basket cover hides a tiger and it's cub snoozing away in the afternoon heat.

Holiday homework woes

So. Holiday homework. Projects. The bane of every parent. The nightmare of every mum and dad. Every time I see someone with a harried look on their face, walking around clutching plasic folders and A3/A4 sheets, chart paper and thermocole, getting into the car for a quick dash down to the stationery shop for buying some glue or feathers, my heart melts in sympathy.

Been there, done that, you know :)

I don't know how it is in other cities, but the Delhi newspapers have been full of articles like this. We ourselves have a "homework uncle" in our neighbourhood, who for a fee will execute your ward's school projects. Is it any wonder that when Ads submits his projects or assignments, he comes back carrying tales of how terrific everyone else's project looked, as opposed to our home-made, eco-friendly output? I've seen some of these works of art displayed in the school corridors during the Parent-Teacher meetings and I'm ready to bet my last dollar that no first or second-grader could have made them. Or else, there are a heck of a lot of super-talented moms out there. I refuse to believe the latter too, it would be too damaging to my ego :)

This year as well, Ads got homework in all subjects (English, Math, EVS, Hindi). Now I simply don't understand why kids need to have homework during the holidays. Its a holiday, in case nobody noticed. Kids should have nothing to do during vacation. In fact, today's generation needs idleness much more than we did simply because most of them don't seem to know how to handle boredom. And when can kids just be kids if not during the summer vacation? They definitely don't have the time during the school year. Why add the pressure of homework on top of the classes and summer camps that they are probably going to anyway?

Someone definitely had put in some serious thought into the homework assignment design, that much was apparent. I did appreciate that. The theme was to compare the era of Ads's grandparents (1950s to 1960s) to the current era. In English, they had to interview each grandparent and write down about the differences in communication technologies and why these changes occured. In Math, they had to look at the currencies in vogue then, and also calculate purchasing power of the rupee (by comparing prices of staples across the years). In EVS, they had to figure out the differences in fashion and textiles. In Hindi, they had to discuss modes of transporation then and now. Pretty interesting stuff, really. 

What they had forgotten or conveniently overlooked was how much parental input would be required to complete the assignments. None of them could be completed without my active assistance. My policy of limited screen time/no video games backfired on me since Ads couldn't use the laptop to download and print stuff. (I still stand firmly by my policy, btw :))

Between my mom, Ads and me, we managed to complete the whole thing. The whole thing was quite pointless, if you ask me. I also know that most other kids in our complex have either outsourced their projects outside or else their mommies have done the whole thing when the kids were at school! What's the point???

Children only retain what they want to and it's a fact that they do forget a lot of what they have learnt, during the summer vacation. I also know that not everyone's home environment facilitates or encourages reading, craft and learning. Instead of overloading hapless kids and parents with homework, I would support if they asked all children to keep a daily or weekly journal (in both English and the second language, if they like). I'm sure they would be astonished at the creative interpretations the kids would come up with. Ask them to bring to school all the artwork they did during the hols. Make them write a story on that family holiday, with pictures. Let them describe something new that they learnt during the summer. Any of these options (just one, not all at the same time!) would be so much more age-appropriate and more valuable that the impractical stuff they come up with now.

As for Math, any decently involved parent will make their children do worksheets every week. I did. When it comes to Maths and Science, I think we don't need to doubt the Tiger mom qualities of Indian parents :)

I'm going to give these suggestions to the school. I hope they do something about it. This year, when Ads cribebd about the homework, I gave him a way out. I said, I will support you in not doing your homework. Go to your class teacher and say your mom doesn't have the time and the homework is too hard to do without any help, so you haven't done it. Do that, and I'll back you up.

Needless to say, our conformist thought the whole idea was insane. Coward :)

My other blog

Just a heads up that I've kind of cleaned up my other blog. It's still a work-in-progress (I'm not happy with the layout or with the name!) but I hope to be more regular at updating it from now on, and not letting it languish as I have been wont to do.

Have a look and let me know what you think :)

Mumbai Rhapsody

 

Green mangroves.

Shiny rain-spattered streets.

Chaotic  traffic (so what’s new?).

The Arabian sea lashing against breakers.

The queen’s necklace twinkling away.

Sodium vapour lamps.

The beautiful crumbling buildings in Town.

Marvelling that Regal theatre is still standing.

An avenue of trees in Ballard Estate.

Worli Sea Link looming in the distance.

Walking in the midnight rain at Marine Drive.

Mumbai is most lovely in the rains.

So says someone who doesn’t have to live in Mumbai :)

I am soaking up all the rain and cold (literally and figuratively) in anticipation of my return to 46 degree scorchers in Gurgaon. While on the subject, I'm here to attend and conduct a business skills workshop for wannabe women entrepreneurs from lower-income groups. Three days of intensive teaching and learning with 45 cheerful and enthusiastic girls is proving to be a lot of fun. The only reason I was even able to travel this time was because my parents as always stepped upto the challenge of parenting and grandparenting while I was away. Yet some more people I have to thank for making life that wee bit easier :)

Dad S vs Mom Me

This is not a delayed Father's Day post or anything like that :) I thought of this post after coming back home from our Kumaon break, when we had those episodes of the kids throwing up one after the other while driving through mountain roads. Ads has just finished his session (!) and I knew Y would be up next, so I elected to sit in the front seat with her on my lap. I generally never allow the kids on the front seat but it makes a big difference when you are nauseous if you are up front. 

In this case, Y did not seem to feel any better. I kept asking her "How do you feel - are you going to throw up?" and she would always reply in the negative. S was right at the back and he kept telling me "Don't go by what she says - stop the car and get her down." Of course, I did not listen :) 

And obviously, the next minute, she had coughed and thrown up all over me :(

I was cleaning up and S came around and said "I told you so. She's not Ads. You need to focus on the non-verbal clues."

So I did not really appreciate being fed a parenting lesson when I was covered in puke. However, the episode did underline my husband's vastly superior parenting skills, relative to my own. I used to feel a little insecure about it when Ads was first born. Why, both S and I had begun from the same start line, yet from Day 1 he instinctively knew how to carry and soothe Ads, how to change his diaper without making a mess, how to take sprays of bodily fluids with equanimity, how to know when he was falling sick, when he was hungry and when I needed a hard kick up my butt to wake up and breastfeed him :)

Even today, based on their moods and behaviour, he can tell when the kids are about to fall sick. He can predict a hunger tantrum a clear 15 minutes before I do. He knows what they mean even when they aren't saying it. Not that I can't do any of these things, it's just that he does it so much better and faster and accurately than I do. As my mother put it so many years ago - His father's instinct is so much better than your mother's instinct!

I have girlfriends who call S their best friend, because they know they can drop their kids off with S and he'll happily handle 4 kids for several hours while we girls go shopping :) When we go out to a birthday party, S is far more likely to hang out with the kids and play their games instead of chatting with the other adults. I have to tell people - "You see, he enjoys the company of children more than the company of adults." He's happy to spend a whole day hanging out with Ads and Y and then some more. I simply can't take a whole 2 days of my children's company, undiluted :) He'll read to them, play hockey with them, take them swimming and talk untiringly about wild animals. Yesterday I was calling Y for her bath and he said he'll do it. I said no, it's ok, I have time. He retorted "You don't MIND giving them a bath. But I LOVE doing it. So let me do it."

When I'm feeling crabby, I tend to tell him that he only loves doing all this stuff because he doesn't have to, every single day. He has the luxury of doing the bath routine and all the other routines on the weekends only (he arrives too late to do it on weekdays). But even I know that I'm being unfair as I say this. Often as I am giving the kids a bath and they giggle and whisper and throw soap suds at me, I wistfully wish that S were there to witness the cuteness.

Several years ago, I thought I was getting an awesome husband. I didn't realize that I was getting an awesome Dad as well!

So who's giving us a running for our money?

Guess who's floating in the pool with complete abandon and enjoyment and giving the (utterly false) impression of being a swimming expert?

No, no - it's not me. I haven't progressed much beyond where I was in the autumn. It's not Ads, who has finally started being coached by a really nice, young, patient and friendly coach. They have some communication issues - coach not knowing much English and Ads seeming to have forgotten all his Hindi during the summer break. It's not even S, who has now stopped maniacally studying YouTube videos and almost living in the pool during weekends. He is, for the record, doing pretty well with the swimming and able to get through almost the whole length of the pool in freestyle.

It's Y who has been stealing our thunder, with her enthusiasm. She jettisoned her lovely one-piece swimsuits (she has several hand-me-downs and they are just so cute!) in favour of the much more practical wetsuit-type thingy which has a built-in float. It was originally bought for Ads, back when he was two years old, but he was never much of a water baby. Y has been using it now for more than a month and it's really helped boost her confidence in the water. She floats on her back, manages to kick her way from one end of the pool to another, and generally lowers my confidence no end!

Last evening, the four of us were down at the pool and while I was sorting though our stuff and S was helping Ads into his cap and goggles preparatory to his lesson, we caught sight of Y casually sliding into the water. Before we could react and run to the edge of the pool, she was already in the middle and waving merrily at us! What a fright she gave us!

She claims she can swim and float and when the coach asked her if she would come for class alongwith her brother, she turned to me and muttered "Enakku already swimming theriyum" (I already know swimming).

Getting ready for a back float - she has since perfected it.



A bit of Kipling country

A second trip to the mountains followed quickly on the heels of the first one. This year has been pretty good to us on the travel front, rivalling 2007, our best travel year, when we managed 7 holidays in 6 months! I think we went a little crazy that year, though :)

Anyhow, I digress. Ignorant me had always assumed that Kumaon and Garhwal were one and the same place. No reason why I should have assumed this, I never bothered to find out and I just did. Kumaon (or Kumaon mandal - it's an administrative division), occupies roughly the eastern half of Uttarakhand and comprises six of the thirteen districts in the state. The other seven are part of the Garhwal mandal. We went to the Nainital district of Kumaon, very accessible both by road and train from New Delhi. Apparently the temperature was a salubrious (relatively speaking, since Gurgaon is staying put at 43 degrees!) and sunny 33 degrees or so just the day before we landed. We were lucky to get a couple of cloudy days and some intermittent rain which led to some gorgeous weather. I cannot explain the joy of the cool breeze caressing one's face when all one has been used to for a few months is the hot loo!!

We stayed in Bhimtal, where our hotel was, in complete opposition to its website and tripadvisor reviews - quite a sad piece of work. My research skills has not been up to the mark this time and I was a little down and out about it  :) The only redeeming feature of the so-called resort was the terrific views it commanded of the lake, especially from our room. Bhimtal is supposed to be a place where Bhima visited and stayed during the period of the Pandavas 13-year exile. It's a quiet peaceful little town with a lovely lake at it's center.

All we did on the day we landed was saunter down to the lake (a  good 2 km walk), go on a boat-ride and horse ride, have some hot yummy simple grub and return to our hotel. The next day, we headed to Mukteshwar, which at around 7000 ft has one of the highest elevations in the region. On the way, we passed through lush tea estates, delectable fruit orchards (apricots, plums, peaches, apples, jamuns) and mountainsides laden with oak, pine and cedar. It was an amazing sight for our jaded city eyes to see trees bending over with the weight of fresh fruit and ripe fruits fallen to the ground, to be had for the asking. At Mukesthwar, the views of the Himalayas were impressive and apparently one could view the Nanda Devi from there on a clear day.

We visited a really interesting temple enroute to Mukteshwar, called the Golu Devta temple, at GhoraKal. Golu Devta is a local god, an incarnation of Shiva. The temple is very small, clean and distinguished by the thousands of bells strung everywhere. Bells tied by devotees, attached to little chits of papers with supplications and prayers scribbled all over them, little bells, large bells, humoungous bells....it was incredibly pretty!

Our enthusiasm for the day's travels was tempered by a bad bout of road-sickness which affected both the kids. They have been on so many road trips, several of them on winding mountain roads and never seemed to be bothered by road sickness. I'd relaxed into the comfort of thinking they had not picked up this particular gene from me. Alas, it seems I celebrated too soon!

Our last day brought us the best views and the Oooh! Wow! moments - Sattal and Naukuchiatal are two other freshwater lakes in the region which are really really pretty. Sattal is the lowest-lying of the lakes (it's actually 7 lakes, hence the name) and this is our first view of it as we were scooting downhill. Divine, isn't it? :)

Lunch was had on the banks serene banks of Naukuchiatal. Some pre-lunch pebble-throwing and tree-climbing activities were of course a mandatory part of the excursion, for the kids and dad!

The verdict? The part of Uttarakhand we saw was very very pretty. The Himalayas, even the lower ranges, are nothing if not arrestingly picturesque. Emerald calm waters and a soothing breeze blowing off the lakes cooled us down on an otherwise sultry day. I suppose the weather gods were upping the mercury a bit to remind us of what lay waiting for us back home :) A short but relaxing holiday in a scenic setting - that was our Kumaon rhapsody.

Old Delhi again and the Jama Masjid

Exploring one's city as a tourist is always exciting and one of the important places that we had not yet visited in our Delhi explorations has been the Jama Masjid. Anything in Old Delhi is bound to be a challenge because Ads hates it and cannot understand why we would bother travelling on the Metro for an hour and back to traipse around in the crowds and filth. I agree - why do we???
However, the fascination that the history and architecture of the old city hold for us is not something they can be hoped to understand. So, now that the children are away, we thought we would do them a favour by visiting Jama Masjid in their absence!

With great enthusiasm, we were up at 5.30 am, on the train at 6.15 am and at our destination Metro station by 7.15. Those who have done it will agree that walking the streets of Old Delhi is quite an unforgettable experience. Narrow streets, telephone and electricity wires sagging carelessly and dangerously, houses with mysterious dark doorways and staircases, dingy hotels and lodges, dogs and pigeons, food hawkers, men selling "cool refrigerated water", and people people people everywhere. We saw two separate guys with SLRs placing their subjects in designated positions and composing their shots. One was photographing a pair of street sweepers (the human kind, not the mechanical kind) and the other one was trying to click candid shots of a street hawker.

And the, quite suddenly, we caught our first glimpse of the dome of the Jama Masjid. Built by Shahjahan between 1650 and 1656, it was yet another crowning architectural achievement for the emperor who also built the Taj Mahal, Red Fort, Agra's Moti Masjid and many other lesser known monuments.

The main facade.

The central courtyard holds upto 25000 people for prayers and one can imagine it doing so since it is simply massive!

The Red Fort as seen from Jama Masjid.

Pigeons everywhere, having a blast with the feed which is scattered all over the courtyard.

The mosque also has some relics of the Prophet Muhammad which we were unable to look at because we went too early and most of the staff hadn't yet arrived. One can go walk up the tower to the minaret and apparently the views of Delhi from there are simply fantastic. But since S could not climb those many stairs and they don't allow women to go up there alone, we could not do it. Yup -- that's the rule :( I doubt we could have been able to see much even if we had trudged up. At 8 am, the morning sun was intense and blinding!
We were back home by 9.30 am after the mandatory fried parathas and rabri ki lassi at Paranthewali Gali. So that's another one ticked off the Delhi to-do list - happy!

So how did it all go?

Our experiment this summer - having the kids spend part of their summer vacation at Chennai and be looked after by both sets of grandparents for about 2 weeks - was unquestionably a win-win situation for all. Husband and wife got some much-needed couple time and were able to have a lovely holiday to celebrate their wedding anniversary. The children and grandparents bonded far more than they usually do (there's no mom and dad hovering around, after all). While there was definitely an increased workload on all four seniors, the mitigating factor was that all of them are pretty sprightly people with active lifestyles. They seem to have handled the challenge of parenting two small children with aplomb. 

In addition, I can see that the two siblings have become closer than ever before. Thrown together, with no friends to distract them, shuttling between two homes in Chennai, they have adapted beautifully and each has become the other's support system. I would never have expected Y to get through the holiday without her Anna lovingly leading her by the hand every step of the way.

So, yes, I'm really happy we took the plunge this year. It made a huge difference for S and me. It opened up these simply vast pockets of time when we simply did not know what to do. Freed from feeding, bathing, potty-cleaning, book-reading, playing, cleaning-up, homework and assorted other duties that go with the parental territory, we were initially a little foxed by how to spend all the free time. In that, atleast in Gurgaon and within our set of friends, we are a little unusual because we have no full-time help. Other couples with kids can and do step out for dinners and movies and such ever so often, in the late evenings or after the kids are in bed. They can attend pub lunches and bond over bowling sessions with friends. S and I have sometimes been left out when only one of us can attend batch-mate socials or a gathering over drinks at someone's house (no kids, please).

Yesterday, we walked over to Haldiram's for a quick dinner and we saw a PVR multiplex there. We are hearing good things about Ferrari ki Sawaari so we discussed whether we should catch the film after dinner. Suddenly S smiled and said "So, you mean, we can REALLY do that? Watch a film, just like that?" I know it may sound silly to some, but it was a source of wonder to us that we could actually, without any planning whatsoever, just walk in and see a movie, or do something else we liked. The nicest part of the last fortnight has been in reliving our carefree pre-kid, no-responsibility years, being able to talk and talk (and not run out of conversation!), read as much as we liked, not have to worry whether lunch and dinner and snacks will be on the table on time, and....oh well, you get the picture.

The hardest part? The hardest part has been missing the kids, especially for the last week. It was a good thing that I have been up against some project deadlines that had me wedded to the laptop for the last few days, otherwise I would have felt really depressed. I didn't like talking to them on skype because I felt that they would miss me more when they saw and heard me (I was right). When I saw Ads bravely wiping away some stray tears, or when Y said "Amma, I miss you", I felt as though my heart would break. While on the whole I am assured by my parents and parents-in-law that they were perfectly happy and content, I think that probably, just for the first year, we should have stopped with a week and not stretched it to two.

It's such a cliche that distance makes the heart grow fonder. Like most cliches, it is also very true and I cannot wait to have the little monsters back in my arms very very soon. I'm glad that all of us had a good summer (although school re-opens only after another fortnight). It's high time our family got back together again.

Big cats and more big cats

I wrote about Ads' obsession with the big cats a few months ago. Since then, the interest has been very much alive and intensifying almost by the day. He now wants to legally change his name to Tiger. A couple of months ago, I woke up in the middle of the night to find him missing from the bed. I ran to the 'toy room' to find him moving around on all floors in the darkness. I thought he must have been sleepwalking (or sleep-crawling) but he was wide awake. He said "Amma, I am a tiger. Tigers hunt at night sometimes."

Leopards, lions, panthers, pumas, jaguars, caracals, mountain lions, cougars, lynxes, cheetahs, smilodons and many more obscure varieties of the big cat - S and I have learnt about these a lot more than we wanted to! I didn't realize how much I had absorbed until Ads was quizzing me one day, at a friend's place in Chennai.

Q: Name one member of the cat family which doesn't look like a cat.

A: Hyenas. Most people think they are cousins of dogs, but they actually belong to the cat family.

Q: Which is more powerful - the lion or the tiger?

A: Lions are faster and longer, but tigers are heavier, more muscular and used to solitary living and hunting. In a fight between lion and tiger, the tiger is more likely to win. In any case, Siberian tigers are the largest variety of tigers and can easily fell a fully-grown lion.

(This is actually a trick question since lions and tigers live in totally different habitats and are unlikely to be involved in a face-off. So the question is hypothetical and can be argued both ways)

Q: How long are the lion's claws?

A: Asiatic lion has 3" claws. Some African lions have claws that are upto 4" long. Bengal tigers have 4" retractable claws.

And so on and so forth.

My friend was like....Whoa...Aps...how do you know all this stuff?

Sigh. If she had to read about tigers morning, noon and night, from 10 different books, watched every show possible on NatGeo Wild and Animal Planet not to mention Animal Faceoff on Youtube, she would know all this stuff by heart too! 

It's not just Ads. I've met a couple of kids (both boys) who are experts on dinosaurs and polar bears. It does seem to be a boy thing to get obsessive and nerdy about some subjects, from a very early age - Be it cars or trucks, aeroplanes, spacecraft, tools or wild animals. Ads went through the truck and tools phase around the time he was 3 and 4 years old and now big cats.

This is the fact-sheet he has created on tigers. He's made one for the other big cats as well - lions, leopards, cheetahs and so on - but they are all in Chennai and I only have a photo of this one.

Not to be outdone, we had visited someone's place the other day in Chennai and the aunty there asked Y what her name was. Pat came the answer "Tigress!".

Back from the mountains

I'm back! In Gurgaon and 45 degree blistering sun, after almost 3 weeks away - first in Chennai and then out in the Himalayas for our very first couples vacation in almost 7 years.

This particular getaway was very hastily planned by our standards. Consider this. By May I have my vacations and long weekenders planned all the way until November - my hotel bookings are done, itineraries are planned and alas, Indian railways only allows train tickets to be booked 120 days in advance :) For an organized freak like me, leaving town on holiday at the spur of the moment is almost never done. In fact, it has never been done! So when the possibility of a work trip to Jammu came up and the husband casually suggested that he take a few days off and we go to Srinagar to celebrate our 12th wedding anniversary, I said - Are you crazy? How am I supposed to plan for a holiday...like...just a month in advance??? :)

As it turned out, I learnt after making a few calls that Kashmir was out of the question since hotel rooms were not to be had for love or money, not to mention that airfares even from Delhi were prohibitive. My work trip also fell through, so I dumped the whole project back on S (Grrrr....if you had given me even an inkling that you were willing to take a holiday in June, we could have planned this so much better!). 

Help came in the form of our travel advisor, who suggested a retreat near Shimla. At first, I resisted. I have a horror of our popular Indian hill-stations - Ooty, Kodai, Yercaud, Mussoorie, Darjeeling, and yes, Shimla - without exception they are all dirty, polluted, smoggy and hopelessly crowded. However, some googling assured me that although we would be staying 10 km out of Shimla, there would be no reason for us to go anywhere near the city. There seemed to be enough for us to do both inside and outside the hotel (which is a swank Oberoi property located in a tiny hamlet called Charabra in Himachal). So we took the plunge, booked our Shatabdi tickets to Chandigarh and left for HP just a day after I landed back in Gurgaon.

First things first. I'm sorry (and a little ashamed) to admit that I had no, absolutely NO, idea that Himachal was so stunningly beautiful. Shimla as expected was horrible (we had to pass through it a couple of times and got caught in traffic jams!) but that aside, the eastern bit of the state (which is all we could cover) is just mind-bogglingly pretty. I remarked to S that if the touristy bit is so lovely, how much better would the less-frequented parts be?

We travelled to Kufri, Fagu and Chail. The Maharaja of Patiala's Palace at Chail (now a heritage hotel owned and operated by HP Tourism) has the most beautiful lawns I have ever seen, surrounded by hundreds of trees - deodar, fir, pine, oak and maple. We went to Chaba for our first time white-water rafting on the Sutlej (which flows down straight from the Mansarovar lake and is freaking cold!). I realized that our guide was making me paddle furiously when we hit even a slightly choppy patch - a fairly effective distraction strategy. Maybe my constant mutters of Oh Damn Oh Damn Oh Damn were making him nervous! I was very edgy - the raft looked pretty unstable and the water was not just cold, it was menacingly frisky!

We were caught in a freak hailstorm one afternoon which was pretty exciting :) We also managed to pack in a 7-km hike which was charmingly called the "Oaks and Orchards Trail". We went deep into the forest using a map provided to us, caught some great views of the valley below, managed to get covered extensively by spider webs, and saw the President of India's summer haven (a colonial bungalow aptly called "The Retreat"). 

For the most part though, we enjoyed each other's company. We realized that we could indeed talk for hours and not just about the kids. We enjoyed uninterruped meals and conversations, long walks, birdsong and silence. It was bliss. I missed the kids, but I did not feel guilty. They were well-cared for and happy with their grandparents and S and I really needed this time together to bond, free from caretaking duties. I don't suppose we could have given each other a better anniversary present.

So, it's back to regular programming from now on :) I can't wait to go back to Himachal again and explore more of that lovely lovely state. Leaving you with a few photographs - enjoy!

Our hotel...

The view from our room.

 

The driveway upto the hotel, fringed by deodars.

View from the outdoor dining area..

And that's me plugging away at breakfast...

The river Sutlej in the background, and our "picnic" lunch all laid out...if only all picnics were like this :)

The summer so far...

The kids couldn't wait for the summer holidays to begin so that they could proceed to their favourite city - Chennai. We landed here a couple of weeks ago and of course it was insanely hot (not that we were in a position to complain since what we had left behind was no better!) A few days later, I travelled to Bangalore - a 3 day work trip which I combined with a weekend so that I got a full 5 days of freedom from child-rearing duties.

Apparently, Bangalore has had a very warm summer this year. Obviously, I did not find it in my heart to express any sympathy from friends who complained about the Bangalore heat - my standard response was that they were spoilt silly! Having said that, it was unseasonably warm when I compared it to the weather when I lived there, as recently as 5 years ago. I stayed with some dear friends, shopped at the Kala Maadhyam mela, visited relatives, 'guilt-shopped' for my two monsters (!) and caught up with two fellow bloggers for the very first time, in person. The latter was particularly gratifying. Knowing someone in the virtual world and thereafter meeting them physically can be two entirely different things. As it happened, the three of us had lots to talk about and the two hours that we had planned for lunch seemed to elapse with extreme rapidity, leaving us with some great memories and hopes of meeting again soon.

Unfortunately, I was unable to manage a pit-stop at my favourite Bangalore haunt, Corner House, owing to a bad stomach bug which I managed to catch on one of my work days. A suspect vada-pav seems to have caused the bacterial infection and I had a fairly hard time the next day as I was travelling to some villages near Kolar.
I've often observed to S how he gets a rousing reception when he returns from a work trip or even every evening when he returns home from the office. I'm home when the kids return from school and since I never travel anywhere without them, I've never been fortunate enough to be accorded such a warm welcome. My wish was granted when I returned from Chennai; the kids fell upon me and for a few minutes they could not get enough of hugging and kissing mommy! Y kept devouring me with her huge eyes and as I saw the wealth of love behind her gaze, I felt both humbled and grateful. 
As I complained about the humidity in Chennai to the other half, he retorted that he was walking around our Gurgaon flat, sprinkling water in all the rooms to increase the humidity levels!

Such is our summer. Waiting to escape to cool Himalayas next week!

Countdown to the summer break

The countdown to the annual summer jaunt, Chennai-side, has begun. The children are terribly excited - 4 weeks of being spoilt silly, and no mother to monitor sweet/chocolate consumption, TV-watching, hand-washing, nose-picking and dental hygiene! I am going to be around in Chennai as well, but I will be working, and whatever free time I get I'd rather hang out with the few friends I still have in that city :)

This year, we are experimenting with leaving the kids behind in Chennai for just over a week (with my parents), while I fly back to Delhi just in time for my wedding anniversary. I don't know how they will fare without me (rather well, I suspect!) and how I will manage without them (I assume I will run the gamut of emotions from happy/footloose, to bored, to terribly unhappy without my little monsters!).

The first thing Ads asks me every morning is "How many more days to go to Chennai?"

I say "14" or whatever the number is.

Ads will then ask "And how many school days?" :)

We got lucky with the weather in April - it stayed cool for the most part and we had a lot of thunderstorms. May has been more like summer - baking and HOT HOT HOT. I know summer is finally here when I have to skulk in the shade while waiting to pick up the kids from the bus-stop, when the heat presses down on me from down and above and sideways until I go light-headed with the pressure.

Here we come - from the fire into the frying pan (Delhi is way hotter than Chennai!)

Reviews of two Tulika books

I picked up a bunch of books from Tulika lately, based on what I thought Ads would like, and what he should be liking (yes, quite the Nazi mom here!!).

The first one was a book on Indian Dinosaurs (I didn't know we used to have any!) called Stone Eggs - The story of Indian Dinosaurs by Helen Rundgren. I was sure Ads would love this one, being nuts about all things animal these days. He has quite made up his mind to be a zoologist! Yesterday he was quite worried whether he could be a zoologist as well as a paleontologist :) The story, for story it is, is about a brother-sister duo who accidentally discover a bunch of sauropod eggs while vacationing in their grandma's village. They meet a palaeontologist who is excited with their find and through him, they learn about the different species of dinosaurs who existed in the Indian landmass millions of years ago. The book is lucid with and easy-to-read text for a 6 yo, and cute and colourful illustrations. A good starting point for beginner dino-lovers and yet engaging enough for more knowledgeable kids.

The second book I picked up was Barefoot Husain by Anjali Raghbeer. Now I do want my scientist to also have an artistic sensibility :) Tulika has a series of books on art and artists - Jamini Roy, Amrita Shergill, Ravi Verma are some of the others. Having taken Ads to the NGMA and some art shows, the names are not wholly alien to him and I started with Husain because he was particularly interested in his work when we visited the India Art Fair in January. Specifically he thought the horses looked very majestic and he thought Husain must not have been great at drawing expressions on faces and that's why his faces were blank :)
This book goes into flashback mode on Husain's early years, interspersed with his famous paintings. There's a fair back of flitting back and forth in time and the whole narrative happens in the imagination of a little boy who has been taken on a field trip to the Modern Art Museum. I think some of that was fairly confusing for Ads, but on future readings, perhaps I'll focus more on the art and less on the narrative. I'm looking forward to picking up more books on the series.

The third and final book is The Snow King's Daughter by Sowmya Rajendran. We haven't yet found the time to read it but it seems like a good opening to discuss a rather sensitive and weighty topic, so I am looking forward to Ads' take on the book. He gets somewhat hamstrung by his sister, who insists on sitting with us when we read and offering her valuable comments :) Case in point: We were reading Hanuman's Ramayan (another great book and the first one I read by Devdutt Patnaik) and discussing it when Y piped in: But tomato-kku enna aachu (What happened to the tomato?)
Me and Ads: Huh? Tomato-aa? What? Which tomato?
Y: Adhu-la tomato irundhudhey!
Ads (in disgust): There's no tomato in the story, Kondila! (The last word is what he calls her when he wants to annoy her, no one knows what it means but it makes her see red!)
Y: Waaaaaa....!!! (effectively ending the reading session, which I am sure was her intention all along!!)
I'm not sure how often I will post kiddie book reviews here, but I will try and post whenever we read something that is exceptional or different. Since we read a lot, hopefully that should not be too difficult!

Another Bee-themed activity - a bumblebee costume

What? I have to come up with a homemade bee costume? What the $%!!!**&*!!!

I cribbed all the way to the stationery store, and spent the better part of last weekend designing and executing this project. As it happens, bees are easy to do and this is what I did.

Take 1 black t-shirt. Ads has an old one that I have been meaning to dump for a long time. But he loves it and wouldn't allow me to; fortunately he agreed to sacrifice the T-shirt for a greater cause :) 

I covered the pattern at the front of the t-shirt by pasting a sheet of paper (painted black) over it. Then I cut out and pasted strips of yellow chart paper all over the body.

For the wings, I took a wire hanger (one of those you get back from the drycleaners and which are very pliable) and twisted it so that it could be hooked over the top of the t-shirt, at the back. I cut 4 wings out of white chart paper and attached it with tape, to the hanger. I used markers to make the wings look more 'realistic'.

 The antennae were made using a girl's black head-band. Ads loudly protested that he would "not wear a girl's band" but came around after I explained that I could not think of any other way to have him wear the antennae.

Since he was taking the bus to school, I gave the wings and antennae to him in a bag. He would attach both to his costume just before he went up to talk.

We made the lil fella pose in the complete costume before he set off. We found the wings were a little limp. Next time I have to create wings I need to give them a cardboard backing for extra stiffness.

Next semester they are learning about tigers. Help!

In which Y proves she has my genes (Yay!)

...and she did it by sleeping...yes, she really is fast asleep...in this position.

I'm the one who sleeps in such odd positions, feet bent at 90 degrees and up in the air. Yes, I am totally comfortable and I can sleep like a baby (or Y!). No, it does not hurt :) In fact I'm more likely to wake up with vague body pains if I sleep on my back or side like most other people :)

Ads is like his father, who can't bend his knees without the latter emitting an alarming creaking sound.

So, there's atleast one thing that my daughter inherits from me...even if it's something weird!

New year, same old school

The nicest thing (for me) of the first day of school for Ads this year was just how uneventful it was. No drama, no tears flowing down both our faces and no stress. The only reason being, this is the first year in his short life that he has been to the same school two years running. The sense of relief that we both have due to this happy fact was unequivocal and immense.

He was excited about starting a new year, a little bashful about making new friends, a little sad about not having the same class teacher (whom he adored), very happy that this same teacher would still be teaching him English, a little anxious about the kids who would be in his class this year (they randomly shuffle the kids around every year into different sections, which sucks, but more about that in a future post). 

He insisted I drop him at school on the first day instead of taking the school bus. As I drove to school, I kept sneaking looks at him in the rear-view mirror and saw him looking thoughtful but cheerful. As for me, there was none of that deep dread which normally settles down in the pit of my stomach every new session, making me want to throw up! We parked, walked to the school grounds and found his class lined up. The new class teacher welcomed him, I hugged Ads and whispered "Good Luck!" in his ear, he waved me a cheery goodbye and that was it.

I find it hard to put into words the comfort I gained from watching him at ease in those surroundings. I came back and told S - "Ok. That's it. No more moving around for a few more years!"

Though - that's a hastily-proclaimed resolution we might both have a hard time sticking to.

Warming the cockles of my heart

Some heartwarming moments that I managed to capture over the last week, thanks to handy cameraphones.

This scene – Y receiving Ads as he gets down from his school bus and the two of them amicably walking back home.

Big bro gamely trying to lift not-so-little sister, and managing to stagger a few paces!

Must look back on this the next time they fight like cat and dog today and everyday!