Kids

Kids

Monday 23 July 2012

Daddy goes solo

Almost obscenely abundant greenery everywhere, emerald paddy fields, rubber plantations, clean roads, grey menacing clouds – where else but in Kerala? I was in Palakkad for a couple of days for a project that are pitching for. As always, I was blown away by the natural beauty all around me. S and I have done Kerala in bits and pieces over the years and managed to cover most of the state but Palakkad is one district we have never visited.
Anyway, back to basics. S has been in absentia, on a fair bit of travel for the last month. The last week, he was in Gurgaon on a flexible schedule and therefore I pushed for my work-related travel to happen during this time. There was a tiny bit of apprehension since this would be the first time that he would be alone with the kids and handling the routine craziness of a school day. I was confident that he could do it provided the domestic help landed up on time and did not take every other day off as they have been doing of late.  As it happens, my maid and cook have a soft corner for bhaiya; clearly they think he is some hapless male forced to take on child-rearing responsibilities while didi goes off on pleasure jaunts. S was very confident that they would report to work without fail and on time, something they somehow never manage with me! I’m happy to report that his confidence was not misplaced, though I’m also sure they are going to play truant now that I am back.
In fact, the only challenge they faced was how to tie Y’s hair, S never having learnt how to handle a hairband! We had a 15 minute negotiation before I left. Y sweetly suggested that Appa learn how to braid her hair to form 2 plaits. I countered that it wasn’t necessary and that she should be content with one ponytail for the 4 days that I would be away. She was most reluctant (she doesn’t like the single ponytail) but once we were able to convince her that she actually looked better with one pony instead of two, she gave in with bad grace. I’m glad that was the only roadblock we encountered!
S says he was able to manage just fine but that his work had to take a backseat, being crammed into the few hours when the kids were at school. He apparently had a long conf-call with the folks in the US and Y sat quietly at his side throughout, working with her crayons and glitter pens. This might be an important milestone for us in our journey towards (more or less) equally-shared parenting.
Clearly, they all managed just fine without me (maybe even better!). Have I made myself redundant? I certainly hope so!

16 comments:

  1. wow, the kids and the hubby managed fine without you for 4 days (a school day included)? that's so nice to hear, Aparna!
    Kudos to your hubby!
    I'd also like to make myself redundant once a while ;-)

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  2. I am going wow at hearing this, Aparna! 4 full days! So now you know you can resort to redundancy once in a while:-)

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    1. I know...kids are a little puzzled. Whats happening? Mom leaves, dad stays put. Today dad has disappeared for a week but amma is here :)

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  3. Kerala is my fav destination too .. No place can beat it at greenery dotted with beautiful waters here and there .. You'l feel like you are in some paradise ..

    'the only challenge they faced was how to tie Y’s hair'
    :) :) jus could'nt help smiling reading this

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  4. Equally shared parenting .. So heartening to hear!!
    I sincerely hope that one fine day in future, this becomes an accepted and practiced way of life in the world.. That would truly be the dawn of a golden age - where gender does not play so big a role on how your life turns out to be ..

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    1. I sincerely hope so, aarthy. We have a looong way to go before it happens though!! :(
      I love kerala too...so lovely.

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  5. LOL at the last line.
    Totally enjoyed reading this. :)
    Kerala must be beautiful at this time of year, no?

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    1. It's lovely, as always.
      Unfortunately monsoon rains have been 70% below normal. Apparently the state relies heavily on hydroelectricity as well, so everyone seems worried.

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  6. Not allowed! Am jealous! :)
    But seriously so good that you are now able to do this - where both people get to travel on work and parenting is more or less equal. The way it should be...
    What is the latest with our super artist? And his love of big cats?

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    1. I'm still not travelling as much as I should/could, noon...kids and family still come first. But to the extent that I can, it really helps me in my work.
      The artist is now moved onto polar bears and the like. Latest obsession is prehistoric beasts!

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  7. Oh tell me about the maids having the soft corner for their bhaiyas and think that the didis are evils ladies in human sikn :P

    Glad that you crossed this milestone...a very important one at that!

    I've left Chirpy with Husby for 1 night and 2 days with the domestic help of course and they managed fine too..but this was when Chirpy was 8 months...a pretty small age to react or trouble per say :)

    lol @ redundant :P

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    1. Cool...hey, 8 months is a pretty tough age I thought...i mean u can't explain anything to them at that age and they get upto all sorts of mischief :) It's easier when they go to school and u don't have to supervise them atleast for a few hours :)

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  8. Nice to see you are reclaiming some of your life, esp since your work takes you to interesting places! Terribly impressed by how you guys are juggling smoothly (touch wood)

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    1. Thanks anita...touchwood indeed...i hope to travel more on work starting this year...its a tipping point for us and the kids.
      Btw check out "travel another india"- think u will like it.

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  9. Was doing a google search on "Travel Another India" and found this comment. Am quite thrilled - so am just leaving a thank you here!

    Gouthami
    Travel Another India

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