A new school year and a new toy

My first baby's going to Grade 2! Terribly hard to believe, and yet, it must be true :) It seems like only yesterday that a heavily pregnant me was sitting in the front seat of our car parked in the preschool parking lot in Sunnyvale, fighting tears and feeling like throwing up while S went inside to drop Ads to his very first day of school.

School starts Monday and we are all set with uniforms ironed and books labelled. The bummer is, we still don't have his results from Class I. Yeah, I know, utterly ridiculous. Instead of doing it the simple old-fashioned way and giving us parents a physical report card, the latter were supposed to be e-delivered. I have been obsessively checking the school intranet for the last week. Today I called his class teacher and she said some other parents have complained. So I will call the school tomorrow and hopefully will know his grades before he enters the next class :) 

Y goes to nursery this year, but she has a couple more weeks of vacation before she starts school.

And, ooh, before I forget, moi is now the owner of a brand new ipad 3!!! Husband's gift to me when he came back from NYC this time. I'm still exploring it, and I can understand (having played around a bit with the earlier versions), why the new ipad is called Resolutionary. Do weigh in with kid-suitable apps which I can download - I'm basically stuck for any ideas beyond Talking Tom and the (despised) Angry Birds.

Crafty hours

I try to do some craft with the kids every week - but there are times when weeks go by without us working on something together, and I don't like that. We seem to get out a lot during the weekends and in addition, these two days of the week are the only time S gets to spend with the kids. I am left with the weekdays when it is hard to schedule anything between tennis lessons and homework and playtime.When S travels and is out over the weekend, that's when we are able to do crafty-artsy stuff together and this weekend was one of those.

It actually started with Y's school teacher sending me a note informing me that the end of the year class party was going to have a 'Garden' theme and Y needed to come to school in a homemade costume. I figured a flower was the easiest thing I could rustle up with the stuff I already had at home. I used thick card stock (I had pink), cut them into petal shapes, glued them together onto a green band of chart paper and decorated the 'petals' with floral patterns (bought from my absolute favourite shop in the whole wide world - Michael's!). Y wore a green t-shirt and leggings and I pasted 2 green leaves onto the front of her t-shirt. The 'flower' was turned into a crown to wear on top of her head. I didn't like to make petals framing the whole face because I think that's too uncomfortable for a small kid to have stuck to her face for several hours.

This is the floral 'crown'.

I don't suppose she looked terribly like a flower but I guess the basic idea was communicated :)

Yesterday, Ads had his end-of-year PTM and we wanted to give his teacher a small gift. Of course, it had to be handmade. I had a couple of glass bottles (in which we get scented candles?) with me. I got him to stick strips of glaze and crepe paper and decorate it with a bead bracelet. We placed a tiny scented candle inside, and packed it in a pretty bag.

Today, we've done Tape-resist painting which is very easy and a whole lot of fun! I have been meaning to do this for months ever since I read Rashmie's post over here. Ads and Y loved yanking the yellow tape out once  they had finished their artwork :)

This one is done jointly by Y and me.

And this one by Ads, a mixture of superheroes and abstract doodlings :)

A batch of shells and pebbles picked up from NZ beaches were painted.

And, finally, a really cool project - to make cute plastic lanterns from mineral water bottles. I saw this on Mindful Meanderings recently and it really appealed to me. We didn't use glass colours but regular acrylic ones. I cut open two bottles and gave 2 pieces each to Ads and Y. Later I added some beads from a couple of broken anklets we had lying around, and voila!

Reading and more

It's taken Ads a while to start reading all by himself. Atleast, I thought he would be reading a lot earlier, and somehow I had the mistaken impression that kids in India start reading by 3.5 or 4 years. Clearly that's not the case and he seems to be on the same literacy levels as most of his peers. Indeed, I'd say he is doing somewhat better than most. I give a large share of the credit to his school and class teacher, who is also his English teacher. The school in general, and she in particular lays a lot of emphasis on reading and getting the 20-odd children in the class to read aloud in public every single day has had tangible results. Over the last year, S and I haven't had the time to read to our kids as much as we would have liked. It's a fact that we don't read to Y as much as we used to read to Ads. If she does not develop a love for books and reading, I will know whom to blame :(

What really kick-started Ads' current obsession with reading (yes, YAY! Obsession it is!) is his abiding passion for big cats. More than a year ago, I had picked up some books on the big cats. A few months later, his maami bought him a lovely set of 10 books. They are called 100 facts - each book deals with one topic such as inventions, big cats, gladiators, myths and legends, mummies, sharks and so on. All of them are beautifully illustrated, printed on high-quality paper, and written very engagingly. Though Ads loves all of them, the big cats and sharks have been particular favourites.

The former has been a big reason why he started reading by himself. For more than a month now, we have rarely seen him without a book in his hand. He has even been comparing 3 different books on the big cats and finding inconsistencies between them :) The fellow is turning into a veritable encyclopedia on the cat family. Our vacation planning for the year now needs to be rapidly modified to include sightings of some big game :) I am hoping we get to do one tiger or lion park this year - I have been hearing wonderful things about Bandhavgarh and Kanha.
This mother's heart swelled with deep contentment during our break in Alwar, when we asked the kids to pose for a photograph and they did this. 

Inspiring community action in making our little corner of the planet greener

I have long been inspired by Aparna's very successful experiments and initiatives in greening her world by composting, reusing and kitchen-gardening. As an aside, have also drooled a lot over her baked goodies! :) I just wanted to share a video that she had shared in turn, about the community initiative in Koramangala 3rd block in Bangalore, where the RWA (Resident's Welfare Association) decided to segregate their dry waste from kitchen waste. Why this is so important has also been explained in the video.

I've started doing my bit - very very recently - by segregating the dry waste from kitchen waste. The good thing is that I found that we have very little dry waste. Cardboard/paper boxes are reused for the kid's art and school projects (or simply to play with). Newspapers and printed papers are recycled to the raddiwala. Ditto for the glass and plastic dabbas that I can't reuse - they are washed well and given to the raddiwala. One-sided paper is always used for the children's artwork, or else I cut them into smaller sheets and staple them together as writing pads.

Here's the video. Thanks for sharing, Aparna. 

What drama!

I swear my life hasn't been this exciting since.....well, it's been a long time anyway :)

Our landlord had asked us to move, right? We found a place, a really nice apartment, in another block of the same complex. Before we signed the lease, there was a spat between the current tenant and the owner with the result that the current tenant refused to vacate before April-end. Too late for us. Now I ran around like a headless chicken, trying to locate another apartment. In between our homeowner called us to say we could stay until May end - if we liked. I found and liked another apartment, even paid a token advance (there was nothing token about it!) and I was harrying the broker to get the lease signed before S starts traveling again next week.

Yesterday, I met our current landlord in the elevator and he shocks me by saying we can stay for another year! Yes yes it was a shock of the nice kind. Still, we had already paid up for the other flat and I spent a lot of time making phone calls and explaining the situation to an annoyed broker and a relieved husband. How does the husband manage to stay out of all the drama and stress? It beats me!

I have been so stressed about the impending move. The welcome news is that we now can stay put for another year. I asked our homeowner again and again, in many different ways, if he was sure about his decision. After all, the last thing one wants is to be told in September to look for another flat! The fellow seems to be a confused lot and hopefully he won't change his mind again!

So - now's the time to say - All izz well :)

Some respite - until next year! Watch this space :)

Alwar, Sariska and a tiny village called Kesroli

A month ago, I booked a quiet and short weekend getaway in one of the Neemrana properties, which call themselves 'non-hotels'. I'd heard good things about the Neemrana Fort Palace, which is really close to Gurgaon. But this property has a lot of stairs from what I've read and I did not think those would be very pleasant for S to navigate. So I booked a couple of nights at the smaller and more intimate Hill-Fort Kesroli, which is a few kilometers from Alwar city.

The fort is a very small one. It was built in the 13th century and stands atop a small hillock, overlooking the village of Kesroli. It is very serene, and that is its USP. Not a place to gad about sightseeing and indulging in a ton of activities. There's a restaurant, a TV lounge (no TVs or phones in the rooms), passable wifi connection, several books and magazines, and that's really all there is by way of entertainment. A perfect place to unwind, spend time with the family and laze. Watch the sunrise and sunset, sip leisurely cups of masala tea, and watch the village life. You get the picture. 

We went to the Sariska Tiger sanctuary, where we saw no tigers, leopards or hyenas (all of which were on Ads' wish-list), but plenty of neelgai (Indian Antelope), deer (spotted and sambar), jackals, crocodiles, wild board, peacocks and a lot of migratory birds (storks, egrets among them).

Here's our room and the reading alcove.

Just before sunset, from the ramparts of the fort.

Village scene.

Cricket!

 The entranceway.

Going towards the reception area.

Central courtyard.

The staff is extremely good - friendly without being intrusive, very helpful and courteous. This was one of those places which made me run to tripadvisor and post a glowing review as soon as we came back :)

First Holi

The children celebrated their first Holi this year. We were in the NCR last year as well but we had picked the day before Holi to move from Noida to Gurgaon. The day after we landed (Holi), I fell really sick with a bad viral and was out of action for a few days. I don't remember much, but I do know that all the kids did in 2011 was to peek out of the balcony at the colourful fest downstairs as their father unpacked and kept them out of my sick-chamber.

I was more prepared this year. I bought a lot of organic colours and the obligatory water pistols. S exclaimed at the sheer number of packets of colours I'd purchased. "Do you really think all this is going to get used?!!" I wasn't sure, myself. Ads in general hates to get messy and Y hates getting wet, both of which seemed to bode ill for a fun Holi.

But children have a habit of surprising you and boy, did my kids get into the swing of things! After a big breakfast, Ads packed up some colour sachets, filled up his water pistol and headed downstairs. I followed about half-hour later with Y. They located their friends and within minutes, they were unrecognizable in the crowd of multi-hued, sopping wet children. Ads did not mind getting wet while Y preferred to stay dry and pour pink colour all over herself. They had a lovely time and next year I'm sure they'll be up there on the dance floor grooving to Rang Barse!

I'm growing up :)

It's a measure of how far I've evolved that I did not have a massive cardiac arrest on viewing this scene. Though I did have to count *v.e.r.y v.e.r.y s.l.o.w.l.y* to 10 before finding my voice :)

My missing daughter

Every time I sit down to write a blog post, it seems as though I have a lot of things to say about Ads, but very little about my daughter. You know how some kids are so independent, and so mature and all-sorted-out? Y is one of those. And yes, maybe because she's my second, I don't worry and obsess about her as much as I tend do with Ads. Also, while I can predict my son's moods and reactions to the minutest extent, with Y I tend to proceed more cautiously, with a larger basket of logic and reason, as opposed to sheer maternal instinct.
At 3, she has a level of maturity and seriousness which I cannot help but compare to Ads' terrifying threes, when everyday was an exhausting parade of emotional highs and lows. Y does not have to deal with a younger sibling (which Ads did), but still, I believe her personality is so much more like her father's - she's quiet, patient, serious, affectionate, rock-solid. She takes time to warm up to anybody. Ads is a good example to her and as her role model, she will follow him to the ends of the earth. He has taught her to be more friendly and social and better-mannered and one day I hope she will teach him to be less temperamental!
At the same time, she is definitely the big sister too. Running to give him a proprietorial hug and kiss as he returns from school, patting his head and saying "My baby!" and whispering conspiratorially to me "Amma, why is anna in a bad mood?" :)
She knows to keep quiet (and away) from Anna when he is moody. She wants to have 3 kids - a girl, a boy, and another boy, in that order. Apparently I will have to live with her and take care of her kids while she goes to work, although she has promised me she will come back home early every day and take over childcare responsibilities :) She loves jewellery and long hair. Her glasses make her look quite serious and she now understands when random people ask me why she is wearing them. Some days, she is quick to answer in Tamil "Enakku power irukku" or "Enakku squint irukku."
I find it weird (absurd, even) how she quietly plays second fiddle to her vastly more high-maintenance brother. She observes every single thing, right down to how that Aunty pinched Anna's cheek and not her's. Yet, although she remarks on it, she rarely complains. It's a strange adjective to apply to a preschooler, but in her calmness and strength, I find her utterly dignified. 
So that's my beautiful, wonderful daughter. Wise beyond her years. And doesn't give me half as much trouble as her brother does, even now! No wonder she doesn't figure much in these pages :)

Like mother, like son

As Ads is growing up, I can't help but notice many many similarities between his personality and mine. To name just two or three striking ones:

1. He is shy yet confident. He is far more comfortable with adults, especially elderly people, than with kids his own age. Every social thingy we attend, he is a big hit with the uncles/aunties. The kids can take him or leave him :) In our condos, he will strike up a conversation very easily, with my friends. Yet, when I ask him to go and play cricket with the other boys, he hangs back, reluctant to join them. I don't force him, recognizing myself in him at the same age. Shy, introspective, sometime tongue-tied - it took me many years to gain the confidence to be at ease with my peers. He'll get there too :)

Yet, his class teacher tells me, he is different in class, amongst the kids he sees every day. Being the class monitor for 4 weeks gave him a lot of confidence and the teacher says a lot of the kids really like him for his helpful nature, non-aggressiveness and yes...just the fact that he's a very simple kid who doesn't tell tales and doesn't bully anyone.

Some people might call 'em boring! I know that's what I used to think I was, for many years. Quite an un-interesting specimen. The more I think about it, the more I realize I had some serious self-esteem issues :) 

2. He is conscientious. Oh boy! Conscientious to the point of irritating me. Yet, I should know better, because that's exactly the way I am, even today. A couple of days ago, we had an incident at home which illustrates this really well. Ads had tennis class that evening, followed by an hour of playtime, then bath and dinner and before we knew it, it was just half-an-hour left before bedtime. He was busy completing his Hindi workbook which had to be submitted the next day. Now the lil fella struggles a bit with Hindi and is quite slow at writing. I have been noting him working on that workbook methodically, every day for the last 2 weeks. That night, he was looking really sleepy and tired and yet he was plugging away at the last 4 pages that needed to be completed. I knew his Hindi teacher would not mind if he gave it in a day late. I was even ready to give him a note to that effect. I also suggested that he get up 15 minutes earlier the next morning and finish it then. None of my well-meant suggestions worked. On the contrary, he got very worked up and started crying. I felt terrible to see him so sincere and hardworking (when it was not required!) and also extremely annoyed with him. Anyway, we sorted that matter out somehow and I asked S to put both kids to sleep since I had a proposal to be sent out that night and needed to work on it.

15 minutes later, just as I am furiously typing away, S reappears with Y, who looks wide-awake. The minute she sees me, she wants me to put her to sleep. By this time, I was really tense and said a lot of things I shouldn't have. S was really annoyed with me. He asked me later why I was so tense and worked-up and   wasn't I doing exactly what Ads had done just some minutes ago? I had been annoyed with my son then, for not being able to lighten up, and here I was doing exactly the same!

3. He can turn on the waterworks at a second's notice. Sensitive, emotional inside and bravely stoical inside; that's Ads for you. I remember being the same as a child.

Like mother, like son? I keep complaining that neither of my kids looks anything like me (or my side of the family), but now it looks like Ads has picked up some personality attributes from me (including my finicky Virgo ones). I'm ok with that, as long as my short fuse isn't one of them!

Updates - Feb

There's been a lot going on here at Casa Mommyland. Work has picked up a good amount of steam and I have two new blogging assignments (both are paid - yay! And one is work-related). S and I have been trying to sort through a lot of admin and personal stuff. After the kids are asleep, we sit down on the dining table and  get going. That's how romantic we have become :)
The kids break for their first summer break in March (mid-march in Ads' case and end of March for Y) and they have 10-15 days off at that time. An SOS call has been sent out to Chennai for grandparental assistance. Initially, I just wanted someone to come over to watch the kids during their break, when I was at work. But soon, I had another, more pressing reason for help - we are moving again!!!
Yes, yes....we are being turned out of our lovely apartment. We have some time - a couple of months if we need it - but we have moved house 5 times in the last 5 years and this time, I just want to get it over with. We have started hunting for a place in the same complex, and hopefully something will come our way in the next few weeks. There aren't too many units like the one we live in, so fingers crossed!
Moves or no, the summer is here (well- almost) and I am in full vacation-planning mode. (Psssttt....not that I take account of the seasons while planning holidays...:)) Our vacation theme for this year is Exploring India through short and sasta holidays :). There are 2 long weekends coming up - Holi in March and Good Friday in April. We are going to Alwar (Rajasthan) in March, before the summer heat descends and in April, I was looking to go to the Kumaon region in Uttarakhand. I did all the research only to realize that neither train tickets nor hotel nights were available. Fully booked! Clearly there are many more freaky travel planners like me out there. We might still have managed to find the odd hotel or homestay someplace but the train waitlist was a real constraint since S does not want to drive there. Our Mussoorie (it took us 12 hours to navigate the 6-hour journey) and Jaipur road trips (7 and 4 hours respectively) last year have put us off long drives, completely.
So now, there is much discussion and argument in the household about where to go.
Not to forget that with all this happening, both the kids have been down and out with a nasty infection of the tonsils. If they absolutely had to fall ill, I would have preferred them to do it together instead of one by one, thereby making me take off more days than I can afford to. But who listens to me in this family???? No one! :(

I'm going to miss this

Spring is here. And a very short spring it will be, too. I'm going to miss the luxury of my daily afternoon walks. The beautiful flowers everywhere, and not just inside our apartment complex. The warm sun. The circle of drivers who bask in the afternoon sunshine everyday after lunch, sitting on the ground near their cars and playing cards. The huge bunch of aunties and uncles who seem to be a permanent fixture in the outdoor areas everyday. The kids cycling, playing tennis and running around the playground, even at 2 in the afternoon.

Sigh. If only the weather were like this all the time. Oh wait......then Delhi would be called Bangalore :)

That's a random snap, clicked as I walked :)

Flowers, flowers everywhere.

And it's (of course) all my fault

I don't get it. Why on earth is it my responsibility if my husband is as slender as a weed? If I was as thin as a stick, would anyone blame my husband for my lack of "health"? I don't think so. Come on, the man is closer to 40 than 30, can we give him some credit for being an intelligent and responsible adult who knows how important it is to take care of his health? Can we trust that his food choices are balanced and healthy? Can we, in fact, actually compliment him (or me, I have no problem with that!) for being as fit as he was 12 years ago when he first got married, when today most of his contemporaries sport huge paunches and sky-rocketing levels of cholesterol?

Every time we visit family down south, I get this. S says I am highly insecure because no one is actually accusing me of anything. But -- here's the thing -- my silent enemy is the thrusting of extra food down the throat, the "paavom, evalavu olli-ya irukkaan" (Poor thing, see how thin he is), the solicitous enquiries about what are the contents of his daily lunch dabba, these implicit  never said-aloud judgements of my (in)ability to ensure my husband's good health (read 'health' as per the Indian lexicon, people!!!). The fact is that S eats out a lot as part of his job (he does a lot of entertaining of teams that come down from the US/Europe) so he should actually be putting on weight. Isn't restaurant food on a regular basis supposed to make you fatter? He is also extremely conscious of what goes into his body, so he eats no junk/caffeine/sugar. And all this is my fault, how exactly? I'm actually very proud of his enormous self-control not to mention that he weighs a shade less than me :(

Don't even get me started on my kids. I can shout myself hoarse that both of them are currently at the ideal weight for their ages, and it would be as though I didn't say a word. "But you MUST do something about their diet".

Sigh. Time to give up. I'm going to go around making uncharitable comments on people's weight from now on. No, seriously, I'm gonna do it :)

Just for the record, I love the family, such as they are. Even when I am mentally bashing them up :)

Ad-Lib#9

Ads: Amma I want to stay young. I mean I want to stay 6 years old.

Me: You mean like forever?

Ads: Yeah.

Me: Yaaay! I don't want you to grow up too (My internal voice: Though sometimes I can't wait for it! :)) And these are the best years of your life, what do you think?

Ads: Yeah. But the best years are when you are a baby, no? Or maybe like Y.

Me: Babies have the best time. But I don't think you had a great time when you were 3, baby. I think you are happier now :)

Ads: If everyone stayed at the same age, then no one will die. I can always play with thatha and naani. 

Me: But change is what makes life interesting. Wouldn't it be boring if everything stayed exactly the same?

Ads: Ok maybe if we all have to die, then maybe we can all be together in heaven. Can we? How many people are in heaven amma?

Me: Errrrr.......

Quantum leaps in thought always leave me floundering.

Lessons from tennis #1

Ads had his first tennis tournament last week. It was held in our apartment complex and among the 25 odd boys and girls between ages 4 and 8 who attend the tennis coaching. A couple of the older kids have just won a tournament in Delhi and covered themselves in glory so there's a lot of interest among the other kids to do as well as the local heroes :) All except Ads, that is, who is as non-competitive as his father and couldn't care less about winning or losing any matches. 

Now, I've said this before -- there's a reason we put him in tennis lessons, which is to improve his motor skills, which trust me still need drastic improvement. So it was actually a surprise to me when he won one match out of the three that he played. Ads' issue is a) he doesn't care b) he is endlessly distracted during class and I know for a fact he's thinking of Superman or Hanu-man when he should be focusing on the coach and his shots. 

He came back smiling from the tournament. I'd watched the first two matches (which he lost) but had to go back home with Y before the third match. We talked about his performance during his evening bath and even as I was giving my spiel about learning from our failures and trying to do better next time blah blah, he interrupted me with "Amma, you told me winning or losing doesn't matter, but I should enjoy what I am doing. I enjoyed the match. So that's enough." 

Enough said :) I shut up!

Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother - review

I've been wanting to lay hands on Amy Chua's book for the last several months. My library never had it and finally I got so impatient that I ordered a copy through Flipkart. I won't quote too many things out of the book or give you a synopsis because everyone knows what the books is supposedly all about. It is a memoir of Chua's journey as a parent, her insistence on Chinese parenting (rooted in her belief of Western parenting being permissive and negligent) and her ultimate humbling by her 13-year old daughter. 

First off, I found the book very engaging. Chua writes well, clearly and humorously. The book is funny and ironical in parts (which I think American reviewers completely did not get. Chua herself mentions that the irony was much better appreciated in the UK). I myself managed to finish the book in 2 straight sittings and in just about 2 hours.

Second, the book is not a how-to manual on parenting, but a parenting memoir. Chua constantly compares the Western and Chinese styles of parenting (and by Chinese, she means a school of parenting that is highly visible in many other ethnic groups such as Koreans and Indians). While you may or may not agree with her parenting style, many of us from India would readily identify with her constant expectation of excellence from her daughters, her inability to accept anything less than superlative performance, and her being a parent and not a friend to them. Haven't we all come from such families or at the very least known of friends who had such parents?

Third, the most intriguing question raised by the book is "How do you live life to the fullest?" Amy Chua believes the only way to do so is to explore your potential to it's absolute max. She believes that if you give a 5-year old a "choice" then he will just spend all his time playing video games, spending hours on Facebook and eating disgusting junk food. In that, she is absolutely correct. Children do need to be pushed to do better and best. Chua mentions as her mantra, several times, the Chinese "virtuous cycle" where hard work begets achievement begets praise begets hard work begets more achievement. At the same time, she leaves no room for the child's unique temperament and interests and like any other zealot, she took things too far in her quest for excellence.

I'm aware that at some point in time, I may perhaps have to bear down heavily on my children in order to make them overcome any self-imposed limitations. At the same time, making that one's mission in life to the exclusion of everything else, is simply crazy. There were many passages in the book where I was thinking "Dear God, I hope she's kidding. She's MAD!!" Strong opinions, anyone??? For example, this oft-repeated passage from the first few pages of the book.

Here are some things my daughters were never allowed to do:

• attend a sleepover
• have a playdate
• be in a school play
• complain about not being in a school play
• watch TV or play computer games
• choose their own extra-curricular activities
• get any grade less than an A
• not be the #1 student in any subject except gym and drama
• play any instrument other than the piano or violin
• not play the piano or violin

I liked the book for it's honesty (though sometimes I had my doubts whether the author was being deliberately provocative!). Chua comes across as bigoted in many many instances, but then all of us have seen mothers/people like that, who have strong vocal opinions on many issues and don't hesitate to put down others. I don't agree with her paranoid, alpha-aggressive treatment of her daughters ("for their own good"), some of which seemed downright cruel and insensitive. My main takeaway from the book has been a heightened awareness of how important it is to know where to draw the line - between fun and hard work, creating good childhood memories and building a solid learning foundation. The book says "Just because you love something doesn't mean you'll be good at it. Not unless you work really hard at it. And once you become really good, you'll love it even more."

Alternate professions

I was having a light-hearted conversation with a friend the other day, about what profession we would have chosen, if we weren't doing what we're doing now. It started with her telling me she admires how organized and well-planned I am and then of course I had to return the compliment by praising some aspect of her personality :) Anyway, in this you-scratch-my-back-and-I'll-scratch-yours convo, we started to list down apt alternate professions for each other and even after we'd parted, I was still thinking about it. It was fun to make that list and I thought I'd share it here :)

Careers at which I would have rocked - in no particular order.

1. I would have made a kick-ass secretary or office assistant. You know the type where your boss will definitely die if you leave the job ;) His professional life would have been so organized he would pay me the earth and of course I'd make sure that he is incredibly dependent on me and helpless without me :) These kind of assistants are generally loathed by the rest of the office!

2. Doctor - the family doc type and the specialist, not the surgeon (I'd be all thumbs!). I would have just the right bedside manner (or clinic manner, since no docs come home nowadays). I'd be empathetic, sympathetic and never over-medicate. It would also satisfy my deep inner need to be of some good to society so I think I'd take the job very seriously.

3. The military life, with its organization and regimentation is also something that might appeal to the Virgo in me. Physical courage is not really my forte, but I may have done well in functions like engineering or ordnance.

4. I'd have liked to be an editor. I like working to deadlines and although writing creatively and well is not always possible for me, one can always come up with tons of ideas and generally boss the lowly writers around :) Maybe I could have worked my way up from being a features writer to editing. 

5. A travel consultant. My dream job!!!!! Having all the inside dope on exotic destinations, planning people's itineraries and organizing their trip - well, maybe I can still do this some day!

6. Life coach. Just a gut feel.

Careers at which I would have sucked - big-time.

1. Anything requiring oodles of creativity. Advertising (the creative function), writing (again, creative writing), music, painting.....there's no question of learning to do any of this stuff because the talent simply isn't there. I admit it. (No hard feelings, mom and dad! :)) Hard work can only take you so far in these professions!

2. Anything requiring dealing with creative people, like celebrity and event management. Don't think I can take the pressure. 

3. Number-crunching jobs - investment banking, treasury, even accounting. Can't do it.

4. Teaching - hmmmm...this is a little tricky because I enjoy some kinds of teaching. I've done interview-cracking workshops, group discussion workshops, I've even taught Math and basic accounting to college students. I can't teach young kids anything. How sad is that statement from a mother of 2 young kids? :(( I would have definitely been a disaster as a preschool teacher. 

Then there are those professions where you know you are competent but which you don't like. For example, I've been in the sales function for several years. I know I can do the job well but I hate it. Similarly, jewellery design and jewellery-crafting. I think I'd be good at it (I mean, all of us are creative to some extent!) and enjoy it but have no way of knowing for sure until I have time on my hands and can take a class and take the interest further.

I'd love to know what your alternate professions would be. Post a comment or write a post about it and let me know :)

Missy who needs body warmth

I tucked them both into bed at 8.30 pm, as usual. I kissed them good night, cuddled both, and placed them on opposite ends of our bed with a strict admonition to both to face away from each other. No talking, no giggling, and no eyes open! Ever so often, I have left the room only to be pulled back by Ads' anguished cry " Amma, she is disturbing me! Amma, tell her not to cuddle me! Amma, she is too close. I don't have any space!"

I pecked away at my laptop for a good 45 minutes. There was complete silence from the bedroom. I went in to check on them (silence is always suspicious and sometimes unnerving!) and this is what I found.

As always, Y managed to have her way :)

Work, being houseproud, and in awe of those who do it all

I am seeing a distinct difference in my housekeeping behaviour ever since I started working (paid work, that is!). Where once I had the time to compulsively puff up cushions, tidy up toys, keep the kitchen gleaming, and dust behind the fridge; now the cushions lie sadly un-puffed, the toys are all over the place until the kids clean them up, the kitchen stays as only as gleaming as my maid wants, and the dust behind the fridge lies peaceful and undisturbed.

Good housekeeping is now, in the words of that magazine, only Good Enough Housekeeping.

Fortunately, the domestic help has (more or less) not been slacking off. I keep my expectations fairly low in this respect to keep down the stress levels! Y has settled down well in her daycare. As far as Ads is concerned, there is zilch difference in his routine. And work has been interesting and not a little challenging. 

So far, so good. The only change has been how little time I have now to attend to my personal stuff. I'm in absolute awe of all those women who head out to the office every single day after finishing up a day's worth of cooking and caretaking. On the days when I have my meetings and have to head to Delhi, it's absolute chaos at home especially since S's schedule is super inflexible and I can't expect him to cover for me, most of the time.

So that's the update from here. Leaving you with a pic of the little lady, playing her favourite game. Which is, packing up and going off on a trip. She has her "suitcase" hanging from the handlebar (an old battered shoe box), her helmet and her backpack. All ready to set off and see the world. Looks like she inherited the right genes, what? :))

A puppet show and some food for thought

The Ishara International Puppet Festival has been coming to Delhi for a few years now. I wanted to take the kids last year but what with all the shows being in Delhi and starting at 7.30 pm in the evening, the logistics of getting everyone to the city from Noida, and back, seemed overwhelming. Add to that S's I-will-get-back-home-only-by-midnight-everyday work schedule, and it was truly a lost cause. I was so happy when they decided to perform in Gurgaon this year. Epicenter is a really nice cultural and convention center in the city. They have lots of live music (jazz, blues, rock), plays, concerts and other cultural programmes happening all the time, and their Sunday breakfast brunch rocks.

In any case, the puppet festival is here this month. Tickets were excitedly booked for 2 shows. The first one we went to, last Friday, was a production from Taiwan. The 'puppets' were just clothes - shirts, women's tops, dresses, trousers. They danced and they jumped, twirled and swayed to music, expertly handled not by the usual rods and strings, but by near-invisible puppeteers, clad in black and blending into the black background of the stage. 

I really liked the show. Given that Ads hasn't seen that many puppet shows and this one was new and innovative, I fully expected him to enjoy it too. But are kids today jaded or what? He was bored almost from the first few minutes. The thrill and pleasure that I was getting from the show, none of it was visible on his face. I was disappointed, not least because Ads has raised the bar so high for me. He obligingly accompanies me to art shows and galleries and places of historical interest, throws a thousand questions at me and comes up with his own interpretations. I tried hard to see what it was that he didn't like about the show, and came up with nothing. I asked him and he said "It's boring". That was it. 

What I thought would be a simple pleasure for us to take in on a cool winter's evening, an art form that's been around for centuries, something from another land and culture, left him cold. Thinking over it later, I felt I was being unfair to him. I was trying to experience childhood pleasures through him and was upset because his reaction did not match what I thought it should be. A typical case of unjust and unrealistic expectations!

My research sample was not representative enough however. A sample size of just one? No way. Unfortunately, I could not validate any assumptions I had made because the second puppet show we were to go to, never happened. I was a little unwell the day we were supposed to go, and I didn't think I could handle the kids by myself, so I chickened out. The expression on Ads' face when I told him we were not going, I am sorry to say, was one of pure relief!