You know, even before you become a parent for the first time, what lies in store for you. The constant work-load - nappy changes, feedings and cleanups, not to mention scary infant illnesses - are as much a given as the sleep-deprived nights (and days). This is the real scary stuff of mothering folklore. Right?
In my naivete and ignorance, I heaved a big sigh of relief when my first-born started sleeping through the night. Now, I thought with great satisfaction, the hard stuff is all over and I can start enjoying my child.
And I did. I really truly did.
And I still do.
But Ads is making it a little difficult for me at present.
Dealing with the minefield of complex emotions that is a 3-year old is harder than anything I've ever had to do in my life as a mother (doubtless there are other nasty surprises waiting in store for me in this particular career). A day spent with Ads (which is...errr.....all the days of my life!) is mentally and physically exhausting.
That's why I so much enjoy the few minutes I get at the end of every day with Y. We have fallen into the habit of having the master bedroom (and our huge Cal-King bed) all to ourselves during the night-time. It is infinitely relaxing and therapeutic to be around someone who does not feel any fear, embarassment, awkwardness, shyness, anger, betrayal, frustration......Give her a clean diaper and a full tummy, and she is content. What uncomplicated happy creatures babies are.