Friday 25 October 2019

Animal instincts :)

We are more 2 months into the school year. Ads is in high school (gulp!) and Y is in an 'Advanced Academic Program (AAP)' this year. We did not actively seek to put her in this program, but her teachers have observed her last year and decided that she would be better served with a more challenging curriculum in English, Social Studies and Science. She wasn't very happy to move to a new class with none of her old friends joining her but has since made new friends and settled down.
Time seems to have speeded up, quite unnervingly. Maybe all parents go through it, but sometimes I feel quite alone in wanting to grasp the tail-end of the weeks and months as they go flashing by. In four years, Ads will leave home for college and that thought, above all else, is terrifying.
With every day that passes, I feel a strange primal urge to touch and cuddle this soon-to-be-independent child of mine. Often I sit next to him and nuzzle my cheek against his, relishing the sensation of the mild fuzz that is covering his face now, the soft skin belying his growing maturity. He is puzzled and half-amused, half-annoyed at his mothers' strange behaviour. Can you stop behaving like a baby, he says!
Yes.... I am relapsing to elemental ways of showing my love and affection, and he has to deal with it!
Detached attachment should be the guiding philosophy of one's life, I am told. All very well in principle, much harder in practice!


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