Is it a good thing or a bad thing that my
children play so well together that they have not made any friends in our
apartment complex? That they constitute such a complete self-sufficient unit,
so happy and content in each other, that other kids are almost superflous to
them? It is not all harmony all the time. They fight a lot, too (something I
will blog about in a separate post). But overall, they play beautifully
together. I often wonder if it's because Ads is a very gentle boy and Y is a
somewhat boisterous girl. Did they manage to meet in the middle? :)
In the playground, there are other kids around.
But due to a combination of Ads’ natural shyness (something I am working at
overcoming) and Y’s ready and ever-willing presence, he is simply not willing
to go out there and play with other kids. Ditto for Y. They have loads of fun
inventing their own silly games, competing with each other to see who climbs
the play structure first, and giggling nonstop. If Ads wants to make a “house”
for the ants, Y runs up all ready with sticks and stones for digging the “foundation”
for the house. If Y wants to clamber up the slide, big brother is there to give
her a hoist up. At home, Ads seems unable to play by himself. He is always
inviting Y to participate in his activities, and even resents her naptime
because he doesn’t sleep and doesn’t want her to! :(
I realize that this too, may be a phase. A matter
of time. In a few months, I may be blogging about their independent interests
and new friends. But presently, it’s a daily wonder to me to see their
beautiful relationship, their interdependence and their joy in each other. I
wonder whether this relationship will last throughout their life. I hope it
will. Then I check myself. It is enough, it is more than enough that they have
this bond for now; and they have given me the privilege of experiencing it.
Aparna, I see this happening at my place too. I have to shove my kids down after i reach home. They are happy being around themselves and playing with each other. I am just amazed at their bonding and more so because i do not have siblings. The younger one comes home early from school and takes a nap and the elder comes home, she does not take it too well. She tells him to not sleep so that they could play and play.
ReplyDeleteFor Ads and Y i am sure they will bond very well with others as well when they can bond so well amongst themselves.
Heyyyyy woman
ReplyDeleteYou're back and how!!! Wow the posts are overflowing. Don't have your email so will write a long letter here. Actually I wanted to write to u asking if you were done with exams and then said "Nah...she'll be back on the blog when she's done".
Really missed you on the little network we all seem to have built for ourselves on these blogs.
Just read ALL your June posts-- congrats on finishing exams, and the marathon vacation after. Sounds like a lot of fun for teh kids and you! And you were in Bnagalore...just a line and we could have all met -- you two Aparnas, Uma, and me. And aaargh Dwaraka is my part of town...you were so close.
Advaith and Yukta's summer holidays really sound again like mine, with a bonus of cousins thrown in during summer. Today's kids don't enjoy it and I feel bad for them for it.
And as far as their playing with each other is concerned (and not other kids), it's still great, because they are two...look at my little bloke -- can only play with adults -- more worrying ;-)
Anyway, welcome back and three cheers to the mom who actually studied and actually wrote exams.
That is a good thing that they are bonding so well..and like you said it may just be a phase when they are happy just being with one another..
ReplyDeleteAparna, so what if they are happy playing with each other. Being boy and girl, they are going to drift apart to some extent as they grow up. Their circle of friends are going to drift apart. So, why push it now itself. Its perhaps for the next few years they are going to be around each other so much. Then he'd have his own gang and she hers(I know coz i have a sis). They'd probably at each other's goats for silliest of things(I know because I've chased mine around the house with a stick in my hand ). So why are you seeing trouble where there isn't?
ReplyDeleteSumana: So good to hear! Yeah the bond is really something, huh?
ReplyDeleteLife_refactored: Nope I am not seeing any trouble. I thought the tone of my post was pretty positive, overall. But yes, sometimes I do want them to play with other kids :) Btw, they do already chase each other with sticks in hand...in fact today it was a cycle pump :)
ReplyDeleteWait till they grow up and the big b starts bossing over ;)
ReplyDeletepriyank and i played ghar ghar, doctor doctor and tonnes of other stupid games for hours on our own even tho the age difference between us is 4.5 years! even now we find things to do together or chat on for hours all by ourselves :)
Cycle pump eh?? I should share notes with Advaith about various weapons one can use in this context. Brings back my memories.. my sis is 10 years older than me.. didn;t stop me from chasing her and trade blows with her :)
ReplyDeleteI feel a bit repetitive, but just jumped in to say - this happens a lot at my house too! Most of the time I just go about my activities and leave them to themselves. From time to time, there'll be some shouting and screaming and complaining and crying, which also I mostly ignore unless someone is hurt, else they have to sort it out themselves - very convenient for me don't you think ;) ?
ReplyDeleteBiggest advantage of having 2 kids!
And one more voice to say let's definitely meet next time you're in Bangalore :).
Yuvika, I hope they grow up with this bond intact...and yes I am sure every phase will come with its share of interesting moments!
ReplyDeleteAparna, so true! I know I am not the only mom with this "problem" :) It's a lot of fun watching them interact.
ReplyDeleteYeah they fight every hour without fail but can't deal without each other when one is not around. Both of them say 'but now WHAT will I DO?' and promptly settle in to their separate beds reading in the same room, as soon as they are together! I don't even attempt to figure it out.
ReplyDeleteSon fed daughter the first piece of cake at home, with all of us around, total original thought. Ask him to give her a hug and kiss and it's got to be at gunpoint! Go figure!
Sangi: Nope, I can't figure!!!! Beyond logic :)
ReplyDelete